Office Holiday Party Survival Guide

December 11th, 2007

It’s that time of year again. The office holiday party is supposed to be a festive occasion, but we all know that some people can take a good time a little bit too far. That can be incredibly entertaining to watch, so remember to pace yourself and let somebody else be the poor chump that everyone will be smirking about tomorrow. After all, the drunks at this party are the same people who may be determining your year-end bonus and you can’t count on them blacking out and forgetting all of your transgressions by morning. The following are some common office holiday party blunders that can continue to cause shame and regret well into the new year:

  • Inappropriate Intoxication — Keep your drinking to a minimum, especially if you’re a lightweight. There’s a fine line between happily tipsy and embarrassingly inebriated. Beware of open bars as free drinks tend to go down much more easily. At my first-ever office holiday party as a recent college grad, I watched as one of the young associates got ridiculously drunk, passed out on the dance floor, and had to be taken away by ambulance and treated for alcohol poisoning. The CEO rode along to make sure he was okay (probably for liability purposes). It was no surprise when the poor guy was transferred to the Bombay office soon after.
  • Inappropriate Affection — It’s generally best to avoid drunken public make-out sessions with bosses and/or coworkers. What happens at the holiday party never stays at the holiday party especially if there is tongue involved.
  • Inappropriate Attire — Leave the Santa sweater at home. You may think you’re being ironic, but you still look like a doofus. It’s hard to see executive potential in somebody wearing a Santa sweater. At the same time, avoid trying to look too hot (I know that’s hard for you). Showing off your goodies at work (even a work party) is likely to lead to gossip and attention that you don’t want.
  • Inappropriate Dancing — Take a lesson from Elaine. Displays of spastic dancing will not soon be forgotten by your peers.
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1 Comment

I’m thinking of forwarding this to my boss.

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